Where's the Moderation in the Islamic World?

There is one question that confounds westerm observers: if radical, suicide-bombing, Islamist terrorist-insurgents represent a small fraction of the Islamic world, where are the voices of reason in Muslim society decrying the perversion of their faith?
One. not very satisfying answer (to us) is that,while the terrorist tactics are abhorent, Muslims in general must believe their motives are fundamentally (no pun intended) correct. Classical Islam has historically been tolerant of other religions, particularly Judaism and Christianity, as all three faiths trace their origins to one man, Abraham. But there is one aspect of the modern world which no observant Muslim can accept, and that is secularism. The United States, as well as Europe, are the epitome of secular thinking and secular lifestyles. S0 -- the voices of moderation have been muted.
So, what is the answer? I, personally am as secular as they come, and dislike the push to make the United States a Christian theocracy. The only thing I can think of is to make clear to the Muslim world, that although we in the West insist on clinging to our secular governments. we will in no way try to impose our system on other parts of the world. We simply can't go into Islamic societies and force feed "democracy" on them, which they see comes hand-in-hand with cultural values they find offensive. We need, we absolutely MUST develop a live-and-let-live policy to those whose cultures don't coincide with ours.